


Garden Pest

by fenrislorsrai



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Baking, Comedy, Crowley Crowley's himself, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Food, Gardens & Gardening, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-02
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:53:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26775436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fenrislorsrai/pseuds/fenrislorsrai
Summary: Anathema told Crowley to leave her plants alone.But they needed a little discipline....She knew he wouldn't leave them aloneNow he has to deal with the consequences.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), Crowley & Anathema Device
Comments: 16
Kudos: 34
Collections: SOSH - Guess the Author #06 "I Had No Idea That Would Happen!"





	Garden Pest

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: "I had no idea that would happen!"
> 
> courgettes = zucchini -the long green type of summer squash

“What are you doing to my plants?” 

“Keeping them in line!” Crowley glared at some kind of squash sprout. 

“They’re just getting started.” 

“Already scraggly, undisciplined.” 

“Don’t make me use the hose on you.” 

Crowley hissed and got out of Anathema’s little plot as she glared at his retreating back. 

“There you are darling!” Aziraphale pulled him in close and whispered “Was it getting too loud?” 

A tight nod. “M’fine now.” Then loud enough for others to hear. “Just went to scare the plants.” 

“Anathema is going to hex you if you don’t behave.” 

“M’behaving.” 

“Badly.” But it sounded fond anyway. 

* * *

* * *

Another party that definitely-wasn’t-a-coven-meeting and the garden looked more unruly and tangled. A mess really. Crowley hissed a curse at a bean twined around the corn. It trembled slightly. 

He heard a click and a mechanical hiss behind him and then he was YOWLING. 

“Crowley!” Aziraphale sounded ready to leap to his rescue. 

“M’fine!.” He slunk back to the party. He took his glasses off and pointedly dried them off with Aziraphale’s handkerchief while staring at the witch. 

“We put in a sprinkler system since you were so concerned.” 

“S’lovely.” 

* * *

* * *

This time he knew about the sprinkler. And was suspicious about other tricks. But he’d make sure those plants were behaving. They were very lush, but looked crowded to him, beans climbing right up the corn, which pushed up through the flower-laden courgettes. He hissed at the plants, a firm curse that they should grow better. He could feel an echo of _something_. Buried in the earth. Reflecting seven-fold back on itself. But nothing seemed wrong….They seemed bigger already. It would be _fine_. 

He didn’t like the way Anathema smiled at him. 

* * *

* * *

It was hot now and he skulked off into the plants in search of shade. The courgettes had gotten wildly out of hand. A trellis had been put in to take the beans up and over the walkway. The corn was monstrously tall and a few even sported more than one ear. He flopped down amidst the greenery. Maybe there was something to letting it run riot. He sipped his drink. He looked at the underside of the leaves. Funny, they’d been so covered in flowers last time and yet they were practically bare of courgettes. He’d been right, they needed firm discipline. 

Anathema came to give him more punch. “Since you’ve been so keen on helping, we’ll have to send you home with a few vegetables.” 

“Sure, however many you like.” 

Her smile was worrying. 

* * *

* * *

The entire back seat of the Bentley was full of courgettes. The boot surely was too. They were spilling onto the front seat. Aziraphale was looking at him with lips pursed, not saying anything. Yet. 

“At least we can spend time together baking…?” Crowley tossed a courgette off the passenger seat. 

Aziraphale drew in a deep, deep breath as he sat. “I have some muffin recipes.” 

“Can bring some back, next time.” 

_“Yes.”_ Oh, it was _on_ now. 

**Author's Note:**

> I somehow can't grow courgettes, but love them. Squash borers get them every time. Sad face :(
> 
> So, yes, please fill my car with surprise produce.
> 
> Yes, Anathema has a Three Sisters planting going on there.


End file.
